


Merwin Book One: A Childhood Fraught With Secrets

by Littlemanganeko



Category: Original Work
Genre: Boys In Love, Dark Fairy Tale Elements, Fairy Tale Retellings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-02
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-26 02:59:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13848651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littlemanganeko/pseuds/Littlemanganeko
Summary: In this retelling of the Selkie Bride we revisit the tale as seen through the eyes of the children born to the forced union.Excerpt: The earliest memories I have of my mother are tied to the sounds of seagulls and the scent of ocean spray. My mother was beautiful. As beautiful as all my brothers and sisters were with large dark eyes and pale hair as fine and thin as spun silk. And like little russian dolls they all took after her in a row from my eldest brother Frans to Lisle my eldest sister, then Frank and Hank the twins and Elbenie the youngest girl.They were all fashioned after my mother and moved with her same slow grace. I on the other hand took after my father with a strong shock of red hair and more freckles dusting my cheeks then stars in the midnight sky on a late winter’s night. You would think because of that she would either love them more or she would love me more but she didn’t. My mother had no eyes for anyone but my father and I’m not quite sure the eyes she watched him with were full of warmth and love...*note: there is prejudice, violence, non-graphic non-consent and non-graphic inferences of incest.





	1. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 1/11

Epilogue  
The earliest memories I have of my mother are tied to the sounds of seagulls and the scent of ocean spray. My mother was beautiful. As beautiful as all my brothers and sisters were with large dark eyes and pale hair as fine and thin as spun silk. And like little russian dolls they all took after her in a row from my eldest brother Frans to Lisle my eldest sister, then Frank and Hank the twins and Elbenie the youngest girl. They were all fashioned after my mother and moved with her same slow grace. I on the other hand took after my father with a strong shock of red hair and more freckles dusting my cheeks then stars in the midnight sky on a late winter’s night. You would think because of that she would either love them more or she would love me more but she didn’t. My mother had no eyes for anyone but my father and I’m not quite sure the eyes she watched him with were full of warmth and love.  
My mother was as cold as she was beautiful with a temper as temperate and steady as the North Seas that bordered most of our island. She would spend hours while my father was away standing with her feet buried in the sand a few spaces away from where the tide would march close enough to touch but always stay out of its reach. That was the only time her eyes were warm, they would almost burn then as she stared at the roaring waves with a longing that was written rawly on her face. She would not move in rain, shine or snow day in and day out she could often be found with the wind whipping her pale hair around her stunningly perfect features until it was time for father to return from his his daily trawl for fish then she would quietly return to the house and wait at the kitchen table for him quietly.  
She never spoke. Not with words that lit upon your ears or scratches upon paper. But she would speak volumes with a glance or the fine movement of her hands. Once Frans told me she had gotten her leg twisted in a shallow buried tree root and had fallen with a horrible crack. Her mouth had fallen open and her lips had twisted as she turned a vibrant red but he said no scream had passed her lips. It was as if the gods had descended from heaven and ripped them from her. I sometimes see that scene in my head even if it was years before I had taken my first breath and the false memory of it terrifies me.  
My father was a sailor who had worked hard to become a ship’s captain and one day had returned to this tiny dirt poor village where he had grown up to buy a house and settle in it with his foreign bride. He had sold his ship to buy the house and had never looked back on his choice. The small trawler that he now owned hardly left the shore as he cast about for the seas bounty to sell to the merchants who stopped by our village on the way south to our more prosperous neighbors. My father was a quiet man who spoke few words but the words he spoke usually carried the weight of a proclamation. His face was weathered with years at sea but his eyes were as clear a blue as mine and his curling red hair several shades lighter than the beard that adorned his face and nape in a tangle of russet brown. He may have loved us but he had eyes only for our mother and when he came home his gaze always went to where she sat waiting at the kitchen table for him in silence.


	2. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 2/11

Chapter One  
When Frans turned eighteen it surprised everyone but father when he asked Frans what his plans were. Frans had looked up from the grilled fish stew Lisle had made and blinked his wide dark eyes slowly before asking in a slightly confused voice,  
"What do you mean?"  
"You can't spend your entire life living here and I have no intentions of turning the fishing boat over to you. Most of the girls in the village who have families that might welcome a son in law have shown no interest in you and you didn't do well when I tried to apprentice you to the smithy, so what are you planning to do with your life?"  
"I thought I would continue to help you on the boat father." Frans had answered looking at him with a guileless expression that I could have told him was a bad idea because everytime he looked at father like that father would frown in a way that made his bushy eyebrows draw together like one long log of hair.   
“I have no need of your help I have three other sons who still need to learn the ropes. Grow a pair and find your own way. When I was your age I had already signed on to work my second ship and hadn’t seen my parents for years. If you don’t find a place I will find one for your.”  
At that point mother had set her drink on the table with a hard clatter that broke the tension that held us silent in our seats fearful of the overwhelming tide of words our normally quiet father had spouted.  
The conversation seemed to be over and I honestly didn’t think much on it as the winter snow started to thaw and the first blossoms of spring appeared. Lisle was sighing over how pretty the new fashions were and how lovely the dresses the village girls wore were. She and Frans alone were allowed into town with father and at sixteen the twins would be allowed out soon. But Ebeline and I were still stuck on house duty with the boundaries of our world the coast to the south of our home, the forest to the north, the moors to the west and the road to the east. I couldn’t wait till I was old enough to see the sites my siblings would whisper of in the dark after we had been locked in our rooms in the back of the house. Our parents would be snug in the room upstairs as we pulled the loose board between the rooms so we could talk to the girls late into the night because invariably the girls had seen more and knew more than the boys since they would often be dragged directly to the boat by father.  
The spring festival which brought people from villages far and wide marked the end of the tennous welcome that Frans still had at home. I was up still watching out of the front window when an oddly dressed stranger came up our drive. The fact that a villager had come to our home after Father had made it known none were welcome was almost as shocking as seeing the slumped figure he half drug behind him. The only explanation was that he must have come to visit for the week long festival from far away. The figure looked up to reveal they were Frans and father rushed out to greet them with his face tight in anger and a fist raised. But the man had been yelling. I only caught snippets of words such as disgusting, perverted and my son.  
Father was looking at Frans with growing horror and revulsion before he nodded to the man seeming to have found comradeship with this person who had obviously shown violence to my favorite brother.   
He had drug Frans in the house ignoring us all and only looking at him once.  
“You are too much like your mother, same face, same instincts you were a mistake.” He sneered with uncharacteristic venom at gentle Frans who was slumping against the wall. I wanted to offer him a kind touch but I was afraid to give my place from where I sat half hidden by the curtains.  
“I did no wrong father. I love Ling and we intend to start a life together. His father’s views are antiquated and poisoned there are not many who hold them now. I went to him in honesty and told him I wished to marry Ling. I know I have nothing now but I am not afraid to work hard and create a life for my family like you did. He is not a good man father. He beat me for holding his son’s hand. I fear he will do worse to Ling. You need to go and check on Ling, you need to …” Frans voice was low and urgent as he spoke but father’s back was too him as he pulled a rock from the fireplace and withdrew a dusty purse from the crevice.  
“I will do nothing of the sort you disgusting faggot. If his father knows what is good for him he will turn this Ling out before he can infect his siblings.”  
“What?”  
“Have you laid your hands on your brothers?”  
“Of course I haven't!” Frans voice had risen in distress and I thought he had laid hands on me often. Picking me up and swinging me around for a hug until I had gotten too old for hugs or tackling me and the twins in turn as we had played in the surf. “Father how can you say such…”  
“Do not call me that again. I am not the father of such as you.”  
“But father!”  
“Do not call me THAT.” Father’s roar brought mother in from her seat in the kitchen and her eyes darted from Fran’s mottled face to father with a resigned look before falling on the bag in father’s hand and narrowing in concertation.  
Father untied the ribbon closure and the woolen pouch fell open to fill the room with the scent of the sea and reveal a small mound of silvery coins that shone like new money. A shaft of sunlight cut across his palm and I wondered perhaps if I imagined their newness for they looked old and worn almost as if they had spent years at the bottom of the sea. In the distance I could hear the howling of the wind as the sea trembled beneath the fury of an unseasonably loud spring storm. He pulled my brother’s hand out and my mother moved forward to pull Frans back but Father pulled him forward again. He poured the coins into Frans’ open palm and mother reacted again her face tight with anger and fear. She slapped Frans’ hand away and the coins spilled everywhere in dirty little piles a few of them fell against her palm. The scent of burning flesh was instant and revolting.   
“Go to our room Elsa.” My father said his voice firm and worried as he stared at the mottled skin of my mother’s hand. My mother nodded her head once followed his instructions but not before I saw something hard flash in her normally blank eyes.   
“Pick up the coins Frans. They are yours to take. You are no longer welcome in this house. If I see you near my children I will beat you. You are not welcome in this home take your things and leave.” Father’s voice was a heavy thing as he spoke then went up the stairs to search out mother. Once he was gone I felt safe to step out from my hiding space and stared at the spill of silver on the floor.  
“I don’t think you should take them Frans, Mother didn’t want you to.” My words seemed to shake him and he looked up from where he was filling his pockets to gaze at me with bloodshot eyes and a face swelling out of recognition.  
“You shouldn’t be here Locke.”  
“Well I am.”  
“I need the money Locke, father is furious and I will need to find a way to support Ling and I.”  
“So you are going to leave?”  
“Oh Locke, I have to go find Ling but I will come back to the village and make a life here. I love you guys and father won’t prevent me from seeing the bunch of you. After all the lot of you guys are useless without your super smart and super charming and super amazing big brother.” He spoke the same self praise he always did but his eyes were wet with tears. “Don’t tell the others what you saw today okay?”  
“Okay.” I said as I nodded and we both turned to look at the kitchen as Elbenie came forward a bag clutched in her hands.  
“I put some food and healing cream in there along with your clothes. Father won’t even know its gone. Mother will send him away soon so you should go before he gets angry.” Elbenie’s words were harsh but her voice was soft as she grabbed my hand I realised she was scared which was a shock to me.  
“When did you grow up so smart little sister?” Frans said with gentle teasing as he pulled the bag on with a wince of pain.  
“I was always smart.” Came her tart reply. “Come on Locke let's go sit in the oldman tree. We can watch Frans from there.”   
“Okay.” I agreed as I always did and we climbed as high as we could so we could watch our brothers forlorn figure disappear in the distance.  
“This is the beginning of the end.” Elbenie said.  
“The end of what?” I asked.  
“Of our family.”  
“You are being ridiculous again.” I told her in exasperation because for once one of her morbid prophecies actually caused a shiver of fear to crawl down my spine in the heat of the afternoon sun.


	3. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 3/11

Chapter Two  
That night we shared whispers through the moved board and Lisle complained about the fact that father had banned them from going back to the festival. It was that night that I realised the reason that Ling’s father was so mad was because Ling was a boy like Frans. And that they were in love. I personally never wanted to fall in love after all love never brought mother or father happiness. It seemed to me that gaining a lover was a poor substitute for losing your family. When I stated so Lisle called me an idiot and the nightly talk was brought to an abrupt end which only left me more confused than before.  
It was weeks before we learned more of what happened. As the summer sun lit the sky far past the point that the moon should reign supreme Father announced after supper that he had received word Frans was dead his body lost at sea. My mother’s face had pulled into a look of such loathing it scared me but in another moment it was smoothed from her face and she ducked her head. My momentary fear was lost in the loss eating at me and I focused on not crying because I knew it would irritate father. But the girls cried with loud and open sobs they cried enough for all of us. It still didn't ease the tears in my own heart.  
Weeks after that terrible night we heard the rest of the truth as the twins told us what they had learned on the docks. Frans had booked passage on The Golden Fleece a merchant boat heading north. It had been late for its first port but another ship that had seen its fate brought news a week later. The very sea had opened up and swallowed the ship whole in a rare sea spout. Not a single crewmember or passenger could be recovered and of the ship there had been little more than splinters left.  
“Why was he going north?” I had asked and lisle had been the one to answer us all.  
“Marianne at the market said that Frans was looking for information about a family from one of the North villages. A merchant ship had left that afternoon with the family he was looking for so he followed it to his death.”  
I just couldn’t imagine feeling that deeply about a stranger. Especially someone who my brother could only have known for a few days. Did he really feel that his love was worth losing not only his family but his life for? I thought of the last time I saw Frans and the look in his eyes. I think he would have said yes even if I would have said no.  
Despite our families loss time did not stand still for our grief. Summer brought an unseasonably large catch and the twins were working sunup to sundown with father sometimes taking overnight trips to other villages to sale the excess. Fall barrelled in early and father returned to his normally quiet self. None of us were allowed to go into town for the fall festival or the winter celebrations. Fall frosted into an early winter and the snows piled so high that not even mother could leave to watch the seashore. It was a moot point since father was here everyday and mother never left when he was home.  
It could almost have been the same as any other winter we had spent at home protected from the storms by the stone walls of our home if not for the fact that one of the chairs at the table was conspicuously empty. When it grew too cold me and the twins huddled in the same bed for warmth but Frans deep chuckles were missing. In the morning we woke before our parents as usual and tried to pretend that no one missed Frans telling Lisle that the cold made her so red for once one of them didn't look like the pale bloated belly of a dead fish.   
By the time january came father was in a much better mood and for Lisle’s birthday I pushed both her and Elbenie out of the kitchen to fry and dress some sticky sweet honey cakes. The twins entertained everyone with tall tales about their exploits in town and even father joined in with his baritone about his days on the merchant ships. Without Frans to needle for the one story he would never tell us - namely how he met our mother - it was the most peaceful celebration we had ever had. We would never forget Frans but I think in time the wound left by his absence started to heal.  
Spring was late and summer was short with a paltry catch. Father and the twins spent days away from the house trying to get a decent catch. I asked if I could join in but he seemed adamant that one boy stay home to watch the girls. Personally I thought my sisters were far more terrifying than I could ever be but father stayed by his decision. Lisle stole away during the summer festival despite father’s direct orders and every night she would return relegate Elbenie and I with her tales. As was the norm when father wasn’t here mother spent every night on the beach leaving us to our own devices.  
“You don’t understand!” Said Lisle with a half smile on her lips as she bit into another roll and licked at the butter smearing her fingers.  
“This was the best festival ever. Without the boys or father there I could actually talk to people and dance! I wish you guys could have seen it. The festival is like a whole other world. The harbor is full of boats from around the world and they are all connected with gang planks as people danced from ship to ship. The village streets are full of stalls and wares from the north and south but the prettiest thing ever is the dress in Mrs. Rogers shop.” She sighed almost rapturously and Elbenie caught my eye with a smirk. We had heard about that dress every year. Mrs Rogers had bought it in the capital and brought it back to our village when she retired here. It was a lace dress woven by fairies according to my sister even though fairies didn’t exist.   
“I think it sounds far too loud and dangerous.” Murmured Elbenie but Lisle ignored her.  
“And this year everyone agreed I was by far the finest girl in the village. I was voted the festival queen and spent the day dressed in the finest robes!”  
“Oh Lisle you didn’t! Father will be furious when he hears.” Elbenie stated her skin turning even more pale.  
“But Elbie he will never know! He is fishing the eastern bay.” Lisle told her with a liting laugh.  
“Stupid girl, Father will return and the entire village will tell him.” Elbenie stated and Lisle’s face fell blank.  
“Oh no I ... but I…” As Lisle started mumbling I excused myself from the table and head out to look on the beach. I brought mother a plate like I did every night prior but she ignored both me and the food. It would be gone by morning but she wouldn’t eat while I stayed. Instead she kept her eyes on the horizon to the east as if she could see beyond the miles to where father and the twins were.  
“Do you want some company?” I asked her as I always did but not even a twitch betrayed she heard me and the late summer winds blew off the sea to snatch my words out of the air and toss them around like a lost gull before allowing them to fade into silence. Embarrassment heated my cheeks even as I looked away. My presence was unwanted but I still had to ask.


	4. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 4/11

Chapter Three  
Father and the twins returned the next morning but everything was as Elbenie said. We had known the moment he opened the front door something was wrong from the mottled red of his skin.   
“Frank, Hank escort your mother and Elbenie to the beach. Locke you help them until I come get you all.” His words were paced as if he were trying to force calm into them.  
“Why don’t you and the twins have a seat in the kitchen? Elbenie can warm up some breakfast and we can…” I had this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that told me I shouldn’t leave and there was this fear simmering like a common thread between all of us that had me tossing out any idea that would keep us together.  
“No Locke, you get on now. Lisle and I have to have a conversation about her recent behaviour.” He said in that same false calm as he pushed me through the door and closed it firmly. A few feet away Hank was following our mother to the beach and Frank was pulling Elbenie along behind. Elbenie’s eyes met mine and I knew without words what she was saying.   
Father came to get us a few hours later and when we ate dinner that night the house was uncharacteristically silent. Lisle stayed in her room and father had Elbenie sleep on the couch that night.  
The next day we returned to our duties as usual and Lisle told me she was fine with a wan smile as she achingly moved about when I asked. She wasn’t though, even our mother knew. For a brief instance something akin to pity marred her beautiful features when she stared at my lovely sister. It goes without saying that no one went to the fall festival. In fact father stayed home everyday that week and we all walked around on eggshells.   
Winter came late and the week of the winter festival barely had a touch of frost on the ground but without us leaving the house even once change came to our family. Shortly after lunch a merchant came down our drive wearing a coat resplendent with the skins of many animals. Father sent mother to their room and the rest of us stayed put awaiting his instructions. When the man came to the door and father invited him in with a clap on his back.   
“Captain Jacobs, I am Vern.”  
“Welcome Vern, are you here about the job post I placed? I have two sons who turn 18 in a few months. Hank and Frank come here boys.” Father said with a jovial smile and the twins looked as confused as I felt. Weren't they going to take over the trawler in a few years?  
“Ah .. no I did not see that post.”  
“Then why are you here?” Father asked his voice turning colder.  
“My father told my a story as I was growing up that I thought was a fairytale. Of a ship captain who gave him a trunk of gold for an old shell. It was the start of our family's fortune and I thought nothing of it till I heard rumor of the daughter of a retired Captain in a northern fishing town whose beauty was almost unearthly. Then I remembered my father’s tale. “ My father growled at him but the young merchant spread his hands and lifted them placatingly as his pale blue eyes widened guilelessly. I did not like his eyes for they reminded me of something cold and long dead. I took a step back and Elbenie slipped her hand in mine.   
“I do not mean any harm Captain Jacobs, I actually came here on a mission of honor. I am in need of a wife fitting the beauty of my home. I have gathered treasures from the four corners of the world and the only thing missing in my estate is a beauty to run it by my side. Of course recognising the honor you would do me by allowing me to take her hand. I have brought with me gifts of goodwill and when your daughter returns home with me in the southern islands she will have the run of my coffers to pick what your family would appreciate most and I will send my swiftest ship back with it. “ He finished his speech with a flourish revealing under his coat he carried several items that while beautiful were useless in our home. He had small glass bottles used to carry the expensive perfumes ladies wore to court, there was a pouch that carried a long strand of perfect pearls that held the sheen of the deep sea and father’s eyes were drawn to them instantly along with a box that I recognised held the symbol for fine tobacco  
“Father,” Came Lisle’s soft interruption. She had been staring at the stranger with growing hope since he had first mentioned his intentions. Her excitement was apparent when he mentioned his home. “Please father allow me to wed this man. There is no one in this village who would suit me quite as well.”  
Our father pulled his gaze from the pearls to look at my sister with a touch of irritation then guilt. Then he looked at the rest of us in turn before glancing at the stairs. I knew he thought of how my mother dearly loved any item that came from the ocean but she especially loved pearls which were very hard to find and extremely expensive.  
“I see you like the necklace. I have several of them at home and will be glad to send them to my in-laws.” I decided in that moment I hated his voice. It was oily and unpleasant I was about to say so but Elbenie tightened her grip painfully and when I glared at her she nodded to Lisle who was smiling for the first time in months. And I remembered how angry father still was at her about the summer festival. I thought of how he still punished her for her actions and I nodded my understanding to Elbenie.  
“Fine.” Said father with a speculative look in his eye. He patted the Vern on his arm and walked over to the mantle place where he lifted a vase to turn it over. “I had been saving these to send my sons off to their new jobs with a little starting money but I will not have anyone say I did not send my daughter off with naught. Here you go Lisle buy that dress you love so and wear it as a bride.”  
There was a look I didn't understand that passed between them as she held out her hand to catch the tarnished coins. I recognised them from years ago and I could hear Elbenie’s quickly drawn breath but she didn’t speak up until all the adults left the room.  
“No good will come of this.” She stated plainly.   
I watched from the front window as Vern left my sister holding his hand as he led her away. I hoped desperately that Elbenie would be wrong. That night when my father told mother that Lisle had left to be married and presented her the pearls an actual smile touched her lips until she touched them then she turned from them in disgust.   
“Maybe mother doesn’t like south sea pearls.” Stated Frank and father frowned at him.


	5. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 5/11

Chapter Four  
Winter grew progressively worse and we would spend days locked in the house. The harbor froze over for the first time in years and the ice stretched for miles into the sea and prevented any news from passing into the village. Sometime in february father chopped up Frans’ and Lisle’s chairs to use as kindling. It was as if he was erasing their very presence from our home with his actions but he couldn’t remove their memories. During one breakfast when the twins were sleeping in like our parents Elbenie stared at me and said she was terrified of this house and growing up init. She said there was something wrong here and its haunting us all. I wanted to disagree but I had no words for her.

With the first thaw Neil Rogers left with his mother's blessing. He was going to be starting out as a merchant on his own. It was one of the grandest sendoffs in our village and the twins had been sent by father to do repairs on the trawler so they were there to see it. Neil had gotten on the Ruby Mistress who was one of the larger merchant ships that came to our village. Neil was carrying almost all of his parents cash for he would be buying a ship of his own when he made it to a larger port town.  
“You should have seen it.” Said Frank as he grabbed a second serving of fried potatoes.  
“Aye.” Said Hank. “Neil’s parents and half the town were standing on the Quay to wave him off like he was a prince or some such.”  
“Yup.” Interrupted Frank “The moment the Ruby Mistress raised its anchor and turned north to catch the current to go south people started to leave the quay but his parents stayed.”  
“There was a crack of thunder.” Hank continued “And the sky which had been clear and blue turned a roiling black above the ship. It was over in seconds.”  
“A whirlpool opened beneath the ship and the ocean swallowed it whole.” Frank ended the story with a gleeful stabbing of his potatoes.   
Father grunted in disinterest but mother’s eyes gleamed in the candlelight. Elbenie just stared at our parents her quick brain making connections I’m sure she would tell me about later.  
For weeks afterwards waterlogged bodies washed ashore to be buried and broken timber littered every beach along the shore except for the one in front of our house. Months later Neil Rogers was found on the shore with a bruised neck and broken legs. His eyes and tongue were missing as if they had been eaten away but his body didn’t carry the appearance of someone who had been waterlogged for months. Those who found him whispered his body had still been pliant as if death had settled in him hours before he was found not months.  
“I bet he was carrying the coins.” stated Elbenie to me that same night and I was sure she was right.  
Father was angry that summer murmuring time and again about no one getting one over on him. I was sure it was about the fact that we had no word from Lisle or her husband. But the catch was sparse that summer and he and the twins were too busy to teach me about the boat much less take the time to go search for a sister whose new home our father didn’t know the name of. By early fall father received a letter that was delivered from town by a sailor who had looked at me with interest before handing it over with instructions to only give it to my father.  
“He was fine.” Said Elbenie with a laugh her eyes lingering on his departing figure and I shook my head at her antics. The more the twins seemed to pull away from us the closer we ended up being.  
“Don’t be groddy sister.”  
“Ha! It is a not groddy to recognise and appreciate beauty little brother. Just wait one day you will see a fine girl or boy walking down the lane and be saying the same to me.”  
“Not a boy Elbenie, not if I don’t want father to send me to my death to.” At my words the teasing light left from her eyes and she nodded sharply.  
“But you don’t have a say over what you think fine is little brother. No more then you can control who will one day steal your heart. You can only control what you do with that knowledge. After all have you ever seen the twins talk of any of the village girls?”  
I shook my head.  
“Think on why.” She ended the conversation with a sad shake of her head just as mother entered the room and we fell silent awaiting the arrival of father. As soon as the front door opened I brought him the letter hoping that it would put him in a better mood. He grabbed it up from my hands easily and ruffled my hair fondly. He set his gear down in its customary area and ripped open the wax seal on the envelope. As he stood in the center of the living room reading through the letter his face got pale then redder and redder until it gained a purplish tinge. I thought for a moment he might explode in fury with all the odd expressions he was making and could feel my muscles tense in preparation to run. But instead of screaming and ranting he made an odd noise and grabbed his arm then fell over.  
My mother rushed in from the kitchen a look akin to glee on her face as my father thrashed on the floor. The twins leaped forward to stabilize my father’s thrashing body and his skin turned a deathly grey. After a few more moments passed he slumped in place and mother sneered at the room in general before leaving the house. I helped Frank carry him into our room because he was too heavy to get up the stairs in his prone state. Hank had already left the house running for the village so he could get the doctor. If we were lucky the doctor would be in the village if we weren’t then they would have to ride to the other side of the island for their doctor.   
We weren’t lucky and we waited all night long as father stayed pale and grey alternately crying and babbling in his sleep. Sometime during the night I left Frank to watch over father and went to check on Elbenie. She was in the kitchen holding the folded letter in her lap and staring at a cup of tea long gone cold.  
“Elbenie?”  
“I will not go in that room and pray for that man.”  
“Elbenie? What's wrong? You’re shaking.”  
“I am furious Locke. I have read Lisle’s letter. She needs help but there is nothing we can do for her now. “  
“What do you mean?”  
“No Locke. This is not for you to read. If you want to help me then go grab my blanket. I will sleep in the kitchen until you guys are able to move him.”  
“El…”  
“No, I will say no more.” And she didn't for the rest of the night. The doctor came with the dawn and looked father over but could give us no explanation for what was wrong. He said our father was strong and it was up to him to survive then he left taking a good deal of our money with him for his paltry diagnosis. Frank, Hank and I carried Father up to his bedroom. Mother would spend hours standing in the doorway watching him with an expression that slipped between hope and fear. But the doctor was right and in the weeks following he recovered slowly. The twins took the trawler out themselves to finish up the season but by winter father had recovered as well as he would. One side of his face stayed slack and soft no matter the expression the rest worse and that side of his body seemed at odds with the rest of it. Not only was his body affected but his words and you could hear him spending hours a day in his mumbled talk trying to create understandable words with his uncooperative tongue.  
Elbenie’s stubborn refusal to help meant I was run ragged keeping the peace and by late january the twins had taken turns building a chair they could roll faather around in. We had thought that by giving him some of his freedom back he would be happier. He wasn’t. He was hopelessly lost in a way that showed in the gauntness of his face and the trembling of his hands. The twins stayed up late speaking words about the future and Elbenie spent her time avoiding us all. Mother spent very little time at home now. Father’s presence was no longer enough to draw her here.


	6. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 6/11

Chapter Five  
IIt was during one of the startlingly clear spring days that we were sometimes blessed with that I heard father’s voice again clearly.   
“Frank! Hank! Come here.” He shouted to the mostly empty house. It was pure luck that the twins were home instead of working to repair the damage a harsh winter usually did to the boat. Even though I hadn’t been called I followed behind quietly hoping if I was invisible I would be allowed to stay with them and see what it was that prompted my father to gain the strength to speak once more.   
I was right because no one looked at where I was standing a little to the side of the doorway. I glanced around the room carefully. It was the nicest room in the house with a heavy faded tapestry behind the bed to give it a sense of color and odd trinkets here and there that looked both aged and expensive.  
“I want you two to go to the living room.” He said with a distinct tremble as if the shouting had taken all of his strength. “Under the living room rug there's a floorboard thats loose it has a black symbol. I want you to lift it up and bring me everything you find in there.”  
“Oh course Father.” The twins chorused but I was in the living room before them. I knew which board father was talking of because I dreamed of it for all these years. Sometimes it even featured in my nightmares as a pandora’s box that held all the woes of our family within. Sometimes those night terrors are so vivid I wake with a taste of sea water on my lips and hear the sea crashing in my ears sure I was drowning in its malice as I lay there in my childhood bed. Those were the times I missed Frans the most. He was always the one to chase away our childhood terrors with a warm hand on our foreheads and the murmuring of nonsense words that he claimed were a spell of good will.  
I was half terrified that it would be different than my dreams and half terrified that it would be the same. It was exactly the same as my dreams. When the thin carpet that had once adorned my father’s ship cabin was rolled up it revealed the bare wood floor. One of the planks looked worn and dark around the edges like the fragments of downed ships that Frans use to carve fantastical animals from. Down the center of the wood was a series of black marks that looked unfamiliar and repugnant at the same time. My first instinct was to turn away and I saw it reflected on my brother’s faces but they were resolute. Hank was the one who pulled up the board as Frank pulled out its treasure. It was an old oiled sheepskin that was as revolting as the board. The sun that poured into the house seemed to be drawn in by the sheepskin but somehow didn't seem to reflect off of it. Frank seemed displeased that he was holding it but he carried it back upstairs. I was unsure about following it but wanted to be left alone in the room with that hole even less than I wanted to follow my brothers.  
By the time I made it upstairs the sheepskin was laying open on the bed and the scent of sea water and rotting flesh filled the confines of my parents small room. There was a folded bolt of leather in the center of the skin that looked like it had been patterned off of fish skin. Most of it had scales that were shimmering a fascinating silvery white in the non existent light filtered through the drawn curtains but as Hank spread it out I could see dull patches of bare grey that seemed almost painful. I just knew we should not have such a thing.  
As they unrolled the fabric I saw there was an old shell necklace that looked like a nautalis shell on a frayed piece of twin and an old iron dagger that was stained brown. If ever an item could feel malevolent this was it.  
“Take the dagger Frank. It must be done with your right hand and my hand is useless.” Said my father in irritation. “use it to scale a large portion of the skin.”  
As usual my brother’s did as father asked without question. Everyone but father gasped in shock when the scales fell to the bed with an audible clink and somewhere I thought I heard the painful wails of a trapped creature but no one else reacted to the hideous noise. Frank rewrapped the skin looking too pale. I knew now it wasn’t fabric but the skin of some unfortunate creature my father had pulled from its flesh. Hank returned to the living room with it. I could hear the sound of the board being hammered into place but I did not move as I stared at the now tarnished coins that I knew must be cursed.  
“Gather the coins and put them in the pouch you will find in my nightstand Hank.” father said and he moved quickly as frank rubbed his hand against his shirt like he was trying to clean it off. It looked slightly red and stained. I just knew that he would never be able to clean that sort of stain from his flesh.  
“As the oldest boys it is up to the two of you to do what I cannot. Lisle has sent a letter begging for help. That thrice damned merchant has insulted our home and our honor. Not only did he short change me of those pearls promised he did not marry your sister. He turned her out and petitioned the courts for an absolution of marriage claiming she was damaged goods and impure.” There was this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach at his words. I remembered Elbenie’s anger over the winter and her growing fear. A series of clues were laid before me leading to a conclusion I was not prepared to find.  
“He lies, he spent weeks traveling from our home to his. Your sister is now being kept by the merchant in a position that insults us all. Take this money and the trawler to go to Southhaven. Hire some men for protection then go to the Storm Isles. Rescue your sister and take the worthless churls life for his insult. No one will survive such an insult on my honor. You are enough of your mother’s sons that I know vengeance is born in your blood for all who walk on land and take from the sea ”  
Then he started babbling softly with foreign words none of us recognised. We left the room closing the door quietly. But in the living room Elbenie had returned from her wanderings in the woods a wreath of wildflowers woven in her hair as she calmly darned a hole in my favorite pair of socks.  
“Don’t do it guys. That money is cursed. Its obvious there is magic at work here, dark and hateful magic that will lead to nothing but destruction. Look at what happened to Frans who carried father’s coins as a payoff and Neil Rogers who held the money Lisle had paid his mother in hopes of buying a new future. Where ever father went to get that skin he brought back evil with him and that evil lingers on everything it touches.” Elbenie stated without looking up.  
“She’s right guys. There's something very wrong here. I … I’m scared if you guys do this you’ll end up dead too.” I told them pleadingly. The twins looked at each other with one of those speaking looks they shared that seemed to communicate their thoughts to each other without speaking a single word.  
“But how will we save Lisle without the money?” Hank asked with a fearful glance at the stairs, what he was really asking was how would they do what father asked without money. Neither had we money or manpower. I especially doubted my good natured brothers could kill in cold blood even for honor.  
“I read the letter too. Lisle is not a damsel needing rescuing. She knew the likelihood that she would be rejected by the merchant and she was willing to take that risk to leave this house. She was just telling father to stop sending messages to her merchant. His demands for payment were making her already tenuous position with him even worse. Father is a weak wreck of a man and he can do nothing to the two of you. If you do not believe me then take the trawler and see our sister for yourself. Just take the time to burn that cursed money and the skin it came from till there's nothing but ash to spread on the greedy waves of the sea. Using money so cursed with malice will surely curse you too”  
Elbenie had always understood so much more than the rest of us. Ever practical and sensible she usually could root through the bullshit and state the facts. Frans use to say she had a soul older than the sea tides and laugh about her being a little mother. But she didn't understand the depth of the twins fear of disobeying father. By the time we awoke the next morning the twins were gone and so was the bag of coins. By afternoon mother returned from the beach and climbed the stairs with a single minded purpose that set off alarms in my head. I reached the foot of my parents bed in time to drag her off of father. Her lips were twisted in a horrible grimace of pain and glee. She threw something soggy on the bed and it hit father squarely in his chest. It was familiar woolen pouch that was stained with fresh blood.   
I think I must have started screaming then because Elbenie came in the room then and pulled me away from mother. She was holding me and rocking. I think we were both crying and by the time I looked up father was babbling again with his eyes rolled back in his head. Mother was gone and Elbenie shared a look with me.  
We went into town together the next morning. We were both uncomfortable with our first foray into the village and the village was obviously not too happy with us. The trawler was gone. This time it had made it a little farther than the previous boats but this time my brother’s had their friends on board with them. Seven of the villages sons had been on the ship with my brothers when it went down and the fishing boats following them swore they could hear the blood curdling screams. Not a single body washed up intact and this time the villagers had someone to blame for their loss. It was my family.


	7. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 7/11

Chapter Six  
The loss of the twins was felt in so many ways more than Frans and Lisle. Without them or the boat we were stuck with no means of providing for ourselves. Elbenie’s contempt for father ended up in me being the only one caring for him day and night. I woke and helped feed him. Then I helped bathe him and made sure he ate throughout the day. Most days I changed and washed the sheets. He was barely coherent at times and brooding otherwise.  
My attempts at trying to fish were laughable. The sea had no bounty for me. Gardening had never been anyone's gift but Lisle so the bounty we harvested from our small garden was paltry this year. It was by the grace of summer that we survived. Elbenie would often go foraging along the shore for mollusks and occasionally find a tide pool full of silvery fish. I would search the forest for tender roots and fresh summer berries. We avoided the village since that last fateful day when their anger had filled the air around us like a tangible thing. We were both hoping that they would forgive us by fall. Without their forgiveness the idea of what we were going to do to survive the fall and winter were enough to keep me up at night.   
One night as we lay back on the blanket pilfered from Franks bed and stared up at the sprinkling of stars over head I asked Elbenie what I knew we were both wondering.  
“Do you think you’re going to die next?”  
“Me? Ha I have no intentions of touching that money.”  
“But if we don’t use that money we will likely starve by winter.”  
“There is no question to it Locke. We are not touching that ill gotten gain if we do we will be cursed too. We just have to hope that things will cool down in the village. We have small things around the house we can sell for now and that will help us through winter. By next spring we will have a plan. Mayhap I will use the money to see Lisle and get a job like hers. I’ll take care of you.”  
“I don’t want you to have a job like Lisle’s.”  
“Ha! you have always been too prudish by half little brother. As long as I have not pledged my heart or love to any one person I believe it would be great fun and it would make far more than being a merchant on the ships.”  
“Gah!”  
“Geez Locke you are past adulthood this year, sex shouldn’t embarrass you.”  
“I just, Its nothing I’ve ever imagined myself doing and it's groddy to think about anyone else doing it.”  
“Sometimes I wonder if you got broken while you were baking in mother’s womb. You should be imagining yourself doing it with all kinds of people!”  
“No thank you.” I finished primly not wanting to tell Elbenie how terrified I was of it. Not wanting her to know about the heart pounding pulse racing dreams that started with pleasure and always ended with my own destruction.  
“The stars are beautiful tonight.” I started to redirect her thoughts and the barely concealed snort told me that I was fooling no one. But the statement was true. They were brilliant spots of light against a sky as dark as my mother's eyes.  
“Is she still on the beach?” Elbenie asked not needing to explain who the she referred to was.  
“Yes she hasn’t moved for three days now. What do you think she’s looking for?”  
“Who knows? Maybe she just doesn't want to be in that house any longer.”  
“Elbenie?”  
“Yes?   
“Do you think love is always like that?”  
“Like what?”  
“Like our parents.”  
“Oh hell no, Our parent may have many things they share Locke but I doubt love is one of them.”  
“How do you know?”  
“I just do. I think somewhere inside you know it too.  
And she was right. Somewhere inside I knew our parents didn't actually share love but I also knew I needed to hear someone else say that out loud too.

As summer fades into fall I tried to get a job on the local boats or at some of the farms we had near the village. But no one would pay for my labor with food or money. Most cursed my presence and chased me from their property. Sailors were a suspicious lot and many merchant ships were avoiding our little port which only made the matter worse as villagers had to travel even farther to sell their goods. We had tried to sell some of our household trinkets in the village but no one was buying. The mercantile run by Neil’s mother closed its door to us. Neither of us were welcome in their shop and the villagers followed suit. They spat on the ground as we passed and some even crossed themselves in fear.  
I wanted to yell at them that we harbored no ill will but I knew it was futile. A person might be forgiving but a crowd wasn’t and with so much recent death the village had no reason to want to forget our families transgressions. I had a feeling that if they could they would build a gate barring our very entrance.  
The last time I had attempted to go to town and sell the strands of fine pearls Father had sold Lisle for, small children had followed me throwing sticks and stones at my hunched figure. I halfway wished that they would have thrown something useful like a rotten vegetable. Afterall in the bards tales they usually threw food.  
I tried my hand at hunting and had skinned many body parts trying to catch the fleet footed vermin skimming along the forest floor. Elbenie had only laughed at my attempts pointing out that while we all had our talents apparently woodland murder was not one of mine. Father caught a cold as we progressed deeper into fall and during the entire time mother stayed home watching him intently. I would like to think it was out of love but I now had my doubts. When he recovered she left again.  
As our situation grew ever more dire the only bright spot in it was Elbenie who seemed to spend a ridiculous amount of time humming happily to herself given our terrible future prospects. She had a better hand at the forest then I did. She would often duck away in the morning only to return late at night with an apron full of dense mushrooms and toothsome roots. On more than one occasion she brought a freshly skinned rabbit or a precious pocketful of hazelnuts to stew. Even with that we didn't have enough to feed four adults three times a day. I took smaller portions and tried to make sure father had enough to nourish his failing body. Elbenie I especially watched for her plump face was growing more narrow and even with the fall sun giving color to her skin for the first time I worried about how much she was changing. She would just fuss at me in return and try to fill my plate with even more.  
I wondered where she was finding this bounty but feared asking her lest it was some sort of good magic that if mentioned within the tainted walls of our home would disappear. Gone were our late night talks. On more than one occasion I heard her sneak out of the house and when I followed here I could only catch a glimpse of a cloaked figure slipping away into the shadows of the forest.  
Mother stayed at the shore on most nights and I gave up trying to get her to eat unless she returned home. Her presence on the beach was a constant thing. She would roam the shore by daylight and moon shadow always on the edge of the meeting of sea and sand. Never touching the water but always staring at it as her shadow stretched far beyond where where her body stood. It always seemed far larger than her tiny frame.  
Having grown up believing magic was a lie and had long since faded from the realms of our world it sure felt like I was constantly surrounded by it.


	8. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 8/11

Chapter Seven  
The worry for our future was never far from my mind and when Elbenie woke me late one night I was expecting it. I just knew she would tell me about the love she found and that she was leaving this cursed house far behind. I wouldn’t blame her I had decided days ago when she had stopped returning home for days at a time like mother. She was just so happy and anyone from the village strong enough to flaunt the prevailing hate towards our family for her had my support 100%. But she didn’t tell me any of that. Elbenie leaned over me with a smile on her face that was evident in the sparkle of her eyes and the twisting of her lips that had become commonplace on her normally pinched face recently.   
The rooms air was far colder than it should be and I had a feeling the first frost of winter would be coming along soon. Was the roof patched enough? Did we have enough candles to last the winter? Had I cut enough wood for the stockpile? I was so tired these days I had no idea. And that tiredness made my brain slow and sleepy as I stared at her moving lips uncomprehendingly. A hunter's moon was out tonight and it filled our home with an eerie red light as if the sky was bleeding. Finally shaking her head in exasperation Elbenie left and returned handing me a glass of water that was bitingly cold and chased some of the thought fog away.  
“Are you here now Locke?”She said with a shake of her head and for some reason in the light of the hunters moon her hair looked darker almost burnished.   
“Aye.”  
“Don’t say aye, when the twins said it they were cool when you say it you sound constipated.”  
“Is there a reason why you are waking me in the middle of the night? Or did you just feel like insulting me?”  
“Psh” Her voice was softer as if she were scared of being overheard in this empty room which once held four but now only held our childhood memories. I would break the extra beds down this winter I decided and use the bedding to replace the ruined sheets on my parents bed.  
“Are you awake Locke?” She asked again and I glared as I set the cup down.  
“Yes, what do you want Elbenie?” I muttered a feeling of wrongness settling in my bones.   
“Locke, It's time for me to go.” She spoke as plainly as she always had and I was struck by how much she had changed in these past months. Tall and thin she was the one most like mother yet different in some important way. She was beautiful but not in the distantly cold way mother was she was nearly glowing with life and warmth. The dark of her eyes had softened somewhat almost melting into a true brown that didn't recall endless depths as much as they recalled fallen leaves. And her pale straight hair really was touched with a hint of fire.  
This was yet one more thing I couldn’t explain away easily or understand. Maybe I wasn’t fully awake and the vestiges of my dreams still haunted me in fact I swore I could still taste the bitter tang of sea salt on my lips. I thought I should warn her so but she spoke again and all warnings fled my thoughts.  
“I cannot stay any longer little brother. I have pressed my time for too long and with daybreak frost will adorn the land signalling the end of the Autumn courts reign.”  
“What do you mean?” I asked in confusion wondering what frost had to do with her leaving.  
“I do not intend to spend another winter in this land of cold iron and broken promises. But I have not forgotten my promises to you Locke. I will not leave you alone to drown under the weight of our family. Our father is a faithless knave and a liar. He was a fool who sought to capture magic he did not understand and only kept it to abuse and squander it. Our mother is an ice cold bitch who has an empty cavity where her heart should be. She cares for nothing but herself and the only feelings she has are those of vengeance and greed. They are both too caught in their mutual obsession to care for anyone else much less the children they spawned. I know this for truth because the very winds brought me tales of their history.” There was a tone to her voice that gave me more pause than her words. my sister was going mad. The stress, the uncertainty, the everything had driven her insane to believe such things.  
“Elbenie.” I started but she kept speaking as if she could not hear me.  
“There is magic at play Locke. We should not fear it as we have been taught. Not all of it is evil and destructive and as our mother’s children we can actually walk the twisted line between the mundane world and the worlds of magic. Your eyes are so clouded by fathers teachings and fear that you don’t see it Locke but you will. The magic is just waiting for you to reach out and feel it. You practically hum with its power. I am going to take you with me past the Gnarled gate. grab your things and we shall leave. It will only exist until frostfall when the Winter’s Court arrives. If we stay till then this winter will bring nothing but starvation and death.”  
I knew her words for truth. Come winter the offerings of the forest would be gone and with the village turning its back on use we would die in this home our father had likely bought with tainted silver.  
“But what about mother and father?” I asked plainly knowing that no one else would look after either when I was gone for they couldn’t even look after themselves.  
“A pox on the both of them. They can starve for all I care.” She said with a narrowing of her eyes that looked vaguely inhuman.  
“I … Elbenie I don’t think I can do this.”  
“I will wait for you at the oldman tree near the mouth of the forest. Say your goodbyes if you wish. I already checked on father and he is unmoving in sleep. Mother is no where to be found as usual. Come to me by daybreak and we will head to our new home. I have friends there who have helped kept us fed all through fall when the humans we grew up with turned their backs on us.” I wanted to point out to her that the humans of the village had never even seen us until recently so she need not spit the word with some venom but I had a feeling my words would only irritate her.  
“I have a love there who dresses in fallen feathers and dried moss. I told him we are a pair and he has made a home for the both of us in his kingdom of ever autumn. You are quite welcome he has assured me. After all the forest folk have no love lost for those who dwell in the depths. We have never been touched by the curse of the silvery coins and have no ties to our mother’s worlds so her bad intentions cannot follow us to his home. We will be happy Locke. We will finally be free of them and we will be happy. I promise you so.”   
Elbenie had never lied to me. Not once in her life. She was more likely to ignore my questions then tell me a lie. It was her promise that had me nodding before I knew what I was doing and with a pleased exclamation Elbenie pressed a dry kiss to my forehead and bumped my nose with hers.  
“Say your final goodbyes to them my soft hearted sibling. I will be waiting for you until daybreak.” Her words were as soft as her smile and she rose with an easy grace that was so reminiscent of mother that it made me ache.  
Once she was gone I moved quickly. Standing and shivering against the cold of the air I tossed on my clothes and wondered how I would fix this. Now that she was gone the bright promise of happiness she had offered seemed to dull against the backdrop of our home of shade and shadow. There were only two possibilities here. My sister had gone mad and I would tramp around with her in the freezing dawn before we returned home to a life doomed with an early death or she was right and we would be falling far deeper into the path of magic than I could ever wish. But to do so I would have to turn my back on my parents who even if they did not love me I still loved.


	9. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 9/11

Chapter Eight  
I headed upstairs first pulling my jacket closer as I peeked into my father’s room. I had expected to say a quick goodbye not wanting to look him in the eyes as I contemplated betrayal. But Elbenie was wrong. He was not held in a deep sleep but tangled in the stained white sheets as he took a deep wheezing breath. The scent of sickness and waste clung to the air here no matter how often I cleaned. I felt my heart constrict at the sight of how pitiful he was. I just wished he could go back to being the father I remembered. Not the man who threw out Frans but the one who would return from a long day on the boat and bring with him a string of sugared sweetmeats from town. He would always smile then with a twinkle of mischief in his eyes and make me promise not to tell the others but inevitably I would share my treasure after our parents had gone to sleep and everyone would offered a murmured thanks for the sharp bite of candied fruit.  
“Come Locke.” My father said without opening his eyes. His voice was strong and commanding as if he were calling a dog. I would feel more insulted if I didn’t feel a thrill of hope. He sounded so much like the father I missed that I could almost believe he was on the turn of a miraculous recovery despite appearances. I could almost believe he would go into town and make someone trade with us. That he would buy a new boat and teach me how to fish. That Elbenie would no longer talk crazily of magic and mother would return home. I needed my life to stop falling apart so badly that I could almost make myself believe this would fix everything despite the betrayal of the last few years. His next words destroyed that belief.  
“I’m dieing Locke. With every day I can feel weakness seep into my bones like a poison. The legends were wrong. She may have given me more years, many more years then a man normally has as his due but she could not give me immortality.Still in the end I .. guh … hack … gah…” He spit up a bloody globule of phlegm and didn’t even bother grabbing for the spittoon but hacked it onto the pillow next to him that lay unblemished by my mother’s touch. I tried not to grimace at the thought I would have to clean that soon. “I still won in the end. As surely as that malevolent bitch is cursing me silently from the se shore in the end I won. I got everything I wanted and I won.”  
“you won what father?”  
“Have you ever heard of a Sea witch my boy? Lovely creatures said to be born of the old gods themselves. But I knew what they were, demons given flesh to torment good sailors. Fickle, Fickle creatures. Some legends said they were the vengeance of the sea given form so they can punish those who abuse the sea’s spoils. I knew they were nothing so grand. A sea witch is poison do you hear me Locke? POISON!”  
I nodded silently as his eyes grew narrow and his lip curled.  
“Its their touch. It drives a man insane. Their beauty .. its so. Legend says that Sea Witches will steal into a captains cabin to offer their flesh during the long lonely nights of a ship's journey. On the morning they take a treasure. If the captain refuses or has no treasure the bitch will turn on you and the same touch that brought such sweet pleasure will leave you writhing in agony as your flesh melts from your bones.”  
“O....... kay.”  
“You don’t understand. you DON”T understand. So beautiful. I saw one once when I was a boy. Leaving my captain’s cabin. He was the one who told me about sea witches. Their beauty and their danger. He was the one who showed me how to lure one to your ship. Elsa. Elsa was the most beautiful among them, the most powerful, the most fickle. Poison, she was poison in my blood. I couldn’t forget her. Her touch, her smell, her laughter. And I knew she wasn’t mine. No matter what I gave her she always left. How many had her? How many had my Elsa? Was it you? Were you the one who had her that night she didn’t come? Did you steal my Elsa?!” He was so fervent as he demanded an answer of me his eyes wide and unseeing as he grabbed me with both hands. The scent of rot in the words he almost screamed in my face.  
“NO Father I didn’t, are you asking me if I took mother?” I demanded in confusion but he rambled on brushing my words away like flies at a dinner table.  
“But I knew what to do. I knew what I had to do. For sea witches are as strong as they are beautiful, their touch as poisonous as it is pleasurable and their curses are vengeance beyond death. Captain Jacobs was the smartest man on the four seas they said so I knew I would be the one to best a sea witch. I was patient. I was crafty. I found a bard who knew the old tales and listened to them again and again until his throat bled. Then I found a merchant who had a shell, a very special shell carved from the thigh bone of a sacrificed maiden. That took me years. I traded time and again until I found a man who would take me to the mountain of heaven’s gate where the sheep graze so high they eat among the clouds and i killed one of the sacred sheep. I traveled to the main city and asked a witch to carve me a dagger of iron. Well she may have just been an old woman with a penchant for eating the flesh of children but she gave me the knife and the last components of the spell.”  
As father raved undeterred I knew I did not want to hear his tale but his hands were firm and I could not move away from the thickened yellow nails that dug into my flesh or the spotty paper thin hands whose appearance was betrayed by the strength in their grip upon me.  
“I was an old many gnarled with age by then but when I called her she came. The most beautiful creature in creation. Elsa. She laid upon my flesh like she had when I was a young man and did as I demanded. Her sweet flesh was a treat I had no intentions of turning down. No it would be mine and no one else's. “   
I did not want to hear my father’s voice say such things. I did not want to the the vestige of a man I once believed to be my hero crumble all my childhood beliefs of him in this all too human moment. No I couldn’t say he was just being human because I knew this story could only get worse and most humans were not monsters masquerading as men. I wondered if he would let me leave this night with any respect for him left.  
“As I pulled out of her body I reached under my pillow to grab the shell necklace. It had been laced onto a piece of fresh twine and when I placed it on her breast oh how she screamed. But you couldn’t hear a single word. Without her words she had lost her power to curse me or any other. The shell that had only been the size of a pearl grew larger and larger as it pulled her magic from her until it finally fell to the sticky sheets and she lay there trembling her eyes full of pain and tears as she pleadingly reached her hand to me like a dumb animal. She did look fetching enough for me to partake of her sweet flesh again but only once for there was too much to do my boy. I used the potion the witch gave me to douse her and she thrashed as her hideous true form was revealed. Her legs shriveled and melded as they became covered in a thin skin of scales and her upper body changed too just not as much. The smell of it was so revolting that scent of seawater …”  
“And decay.” I added. He looked at me thoughtfully and nodded.  
“I used iron chains no thicker than a necklace to bind her as I went to work. It was like cleaning a fish. At some point she just stopped moving and stared at me blankly. There was so much to do to make her human, cut the webbing between his fingers, cut the fins off her arms and ears, scrape the scales off her shoulders and face then cut that hideous tail off of her legs. They were there once I skinned her. It was then I discovered her scales became coin. Even her fins crumpled into fine silver ore that I traded later on. But I couldn’t stop with just revealing my beauty. When I cut her heart out she came back screaming silently the entire time. I said her flesh was sweet but her blood was sweeter and I discovered after supping my fill I had been given the body and visage of a young man once more and we were tied by her very heart's blood. She would always be by my side and the very sea itself was barred from her for she could no longer belong to it when she belonged to me. I wrapped her tail in the sheepskin since everyone knows creatures of the sea cannot abide by creatures of land or air. The sheep that were both held a special taboo against one’s like Elsa”  
“Why?” I asked with my voice barely a croake choking back tears as he recounted his tortures of my mother like I would congratulate him for it. Like he was a hero for what he did.  
“You don’t understand my boy. She was so beautiful. The was she laughed, the sounds of her songs. She was the treasure of the North sea and I deserved her. No matter what I offered her, no matter what I gave her she was like an animal. The spells that drew a sea witch to your side for the night melted by dawn and no matter how great a treasure I offered her she never stayed. She didn’t want me! She only did what the spell wanted for a night and anyone who had the spell had her. But she was mine. She just didn’t know it. My crew left me. They said I was mad. They said I had dabbled in dark magic and it would curse me. Rumors spread and I spent years moving from ship to ship before we finally settled here.” He was staring at me so intently that I knew he could not be seeing me as much as he was seeing his past.   
“I lost everything for her but it was worth it. She tried to defy me by whelping five children each more cursed than the last until you. You are my proof of success. A sea witch cannot have a human child but there is none more human than you Locke. You are the proof that I won. That I have finally taken her immortality. Now I shall die, no one shall ever have her again and she will be cursed to walk the land until she ages and dies like any other mortal beast. If only she had chosen me instead of acting like an animal this would never have happened.” He stopped to cough and laugh at the same time looking like the madman his crew said he was. Was this really my father? Did I really idolize this man?  
“Locke my boy I have always loved you best. You were my true first born son. Child of my loins and inheritor of my wealth. You can have the same luck as I and mastery over the seas. You cannot have Elsa for she is mine but I have not forgotten you. Go to that floorboard and pull out the skin. Take the Iron knife and cut out Elbenie’s heart.”  
“WHAT?!?”  
“Put it to your lips and drink it till its dry. I am sure she carries the same magic as her mother. Place the shell on her chest and you will steal her words and her will. She will be as sweet and pliant for you as Elsa was for me. Cut the rest of the scales from Elsa’s skin. It will be a fortune for you and you can move down the coast. You will have a wife prettier than any human woman and more wealth than you can imagine. Your happiness will only rival my own.”  
“Elbenie is my sister!” I tried to impart in my words the complete revulsion his planning sparked in me. In fact I was only barely able to keep the glass of water I had drunk down despite the violent protests of my stomach.  
“She is spawn of a sea witch and no more your sister then she is my daughter. You my boy are human while she is not. You wear your very humanity upon your skin and it is etched in your bones. You are only shocked because you don’t understand the pleasure to be found in a sea witch's body. In any sea witch's body. Elsa is mine and I will not share her. Her beauty has faded as her power has faded. But Elbenie alone I have saved for you. She is young and supple her body untouched…”  
Whatever he would have continued saying was thankfully gone as his eyes rolled back in his head. His hands had grown slack during his fevered ramblings about my sister and suddenly Elbenie’s words and Lisle’s actions made sense. I wretched out of his disgusting grasp and panted for air in the suddenly fetid room. It had gone from near freezing to warm and humid. As I stared at the man lying on my parents bed who I knew did not deserve the name father I thought he looked odd. His body was almost leathery. In moments his corpse went from looking newly passed to looking vaguely aged like the body of a man long dead. It crumbled in on itself till there was nothing but ash. I could feel it a building sense of anticipation then in the next moment there was a roaring sound and fire leaped from the very ashes themselves.   
Before my eyes the fire leaped up and spread as if it were intent on consuming everything in the room and I stepped back, slamming the door and running down the stairs. I knew I had to end this. I had to make it right in the only way I knew how. I pushed aside the rug and pried up the board. Grabbing the bundle I felt a moment of vertigo and disgust sweep through me but I refused to drop it. As I ran from the house I could see a light in the windows of my parent's room but no fire was chasing my steps.


	10. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 10/11

Chapter Nine  
I made it to the beach unscatthed and for once my mother was not staring at the ocean but she was staring at me very intently. The light of the harvest moon cast her normally placid features in stark relief painting even more beauty in their perfection. Was this the face that my father obsessed over? Perhaps. I refused to think he had fallen in love with her at first site. I refused to believe love could be the root of the horror story of their life together. Obsession? yes . Greed even but not love.  
She was staring at me now. Staring as closely as she ever had with a touch of glee lighting her face everytime she glanced over my shoulder. I could hear a terrible cracking noise behind me as one of the old timbers caught flame and the wood split under the heat. But when I began to open the sheepskin I held her complete and undivided attention. I threw the knife to the side and she visibly flinched at its site the utter fear and hatred on her face almost felled me. My mother who I hadn’t understood but loved with the blind devotion of a child had suffered so much silently while I had jealousy complained in my head how she never held me or touched me seeming to care only for father. I was so ashamed of myself.  
As the sheepskin fell completely open and the fish scales caught the light of the moon the naked yearning on her face was painfully sharp. There was not even a semblance of humanity in her. How could I have ignored her other worldliness all these years? How quickly she healed? How she never ate? How her beauty never faded or changed? How father locked her away.  
How could I have missed his cruelty all these years? How he threw Frans out? How he used and sold Lisle? How he sent my brother’s to their death for his own honor? How he planned to make me into him? Apparently if you want to hide anything from me placing it in plain sight would do perfectly fine.  
I still did not understand his reasoning. Why had this tragedy started? Because he was jealous that a creature he compelled through magic to have sex with him wouldn’t stay? Because she was compelled to answer any who knew the spell? Because she did not give him the love and devotion he felt he deserved he decided to torture and punish her for all her days? He thought I would take pride in his actions and follow his footsteps? It was so contrary to everything I was I couldn’t begin to comprehend it in any way.  
I took the shell in one hand noting how warm it was in my palm almost buzzing with life and took the skin in the other hand grimacing at how cold and slimy it was. When I tossed them over to her she caught them both mid air and took a running leap to the ocean only surfacing several yards away to face me. Her body held angry red patches I knew would never heal as did her tail but her eyes were wide and fathomless. She was more stunning than I had ever seen her and the waves rumbled almost in greeting as she rested on their crests and appraised me.   
I could go with a clear conscience to Elbenie’s home now. I had made everything right. As right as I could make it.  
“I have hated you.” She stated plainly and my father was right. her voice was heartbreakingly perfect in everyway. Her words were ripping into me like tiny broken shards of fine china but I wanted her to keep talking with a desperation bordering on frenzy.  
“Deep in my hollow chest where I once held a heart and now hold nothing but emptiness I have hated you. You were the greatest insult visited upon me during my captivity. Proof of the human seed I was forced to take and bare between unwanted legs. You are a living perversion of everything I am meant to be. The others I could find beauty in for they were like me in more ways that soothed then repulsed. But not you. You are everything I have despised and detested during this brief sojourn upon land. Your father may not have been the first to seek to capture me but he was the most damaging. He hated himself for wanting me and hated me even more for existing. But I am alive and he does not even have ashes left to bury. I have won as I have been fated to do so. Yet you remain as proof of all that has felled me and brought me low. “ What her words lacked in volume they made up for in fierceness. The moon shone in a clear sky but above my mother gathering clouds turned as black as her eyes and thunder roared an undertone to her speech. She was calling these clouds, she was calling this storm I could feel deep within and my legs trembled with the need to run but her voice kept me steadfast.  
“Heed and listen well Locke. From this day forward you will wear the ugliness of your sire upon your skin. All who look at you will see you are cursed by Elsa the sea witch, First born daughter of Titan of the waves and no man’s chattel. Every fiber of your being and soul shall carry the mark of your sire’s evil . You shall be as twisted in mein as his actions were. The humanity that marks you as his child shall be the source of your destruction. You were born a man but shall die a monster. Shunned by those who share the humanity that curses you. Hated by those who might help you. You shall die alone and miserable with solace offered from none. None shall remember nor mourn you. With your death will die the last shameful proof of your sire’s deeds against me.” With that proclamation she may have risen from the sea or she may have turned to foam. For all I know she could have turned into a fish and swam off for I was far too occupied with the after effects of her curse to watch her departure.

 

Pain is a very small word for a very large sensation. It started with the screaming in my head. Thousands of small voices screamed in individual agony as my very cells split and divided at a furious rate. Needle sharp pain crawled along my nerves separating skin from flesh in devices movements that were slow enough that I could feel each individual pin prick of agony before a blessedly short relief cooled my nerves only for it to start again and be amplified in each cycle since my nerves remembered the lack of pain just moments before.  
I could feel skin split like an overripe melon. Ripping at the seams and pulling together in painful knitting as it reshaped my surface in the confines of the spell. My bones broke. They literally broke in a separate canchanopy of destruction beneath the screaming of my cells as each and every piece shattered to the very marrow and then reformed growing together in new and unfamiliar ways as they moved beneath their protective muscle. I lost control of my bowels and my stomach simultaneously falling into the ice cold rushing of the seas waves and for a moment was sure I would drown so in pain I was no longer a person but a creature of terrible sensation. but the water pushed me back to shore.   
It was almost as if my body were fighting itself for the right to destroy me. Mysterious growths bulged under my skin then retreated, bones broke time and again before regrowing and the terrible endless screaming retreated before rising in noise. I wanted my legs to move but my body was spasming in uncontrollable waves. It took moments or hours for me to start moving in my moments of respite. I thought if I moved I might somehow lessen the waves of pain too dumb to realise I could not escape my own tortured body. Then someone was tugging me. warm hands were dragging me. I became aware of a voice outside of my head screaming . Different hands picked me up and a sensation of someone cradling me like a child overtook my beleaguered senses. For a moment I thought Frans held me like he had when I was younger and it was time for me to be put to bed. Then I felt a swaying movement. I was being carried away by someone. Held firm to a warm body that smelled of woodsmoke and dead leaves.  
The sounds of the sea and the scent of salt slowly retreated as the painful transformations of my flesh slowed and my thoughts returned to a more steady pace.  
“What?” I rasped out my throat constricting painfully on the single word. My voice was odd to my ears. It sounded scratched and broken like the fine crystal glass my father had sacrificed to his anger the night after Lisle’s punishment. Its odd sound made sense to me in the maze of my thoughts. I must have been screaming there on the beach even if I couldn’t remember doing so. Anyone would have screamed if they were being remade as a monster wouldn’t they?  
“Oh Locke, Locke how could you?” Elbenie was talking. She was fussing at me as the trees of the forest shrouded us in protection. But I couldn't see her and the stranger carrying me kept moving forward as if they already had a destination in mind more solid than my simple instinct of ‘away’.  
“I was so scared when I heard the fire. The flames were eating the sky like a hungry child. I was so sure you were in there and would have rushed in if not for … I heard your screams. I saw the storm. I knew what you did. I should have never left you to say goodbye alone. You always manage mischief of some sort.” As much as I was glad of her talking so I didn’t I felt insulted by that blatant lie for I was never the one to get in trouble for our scrapes but on second thought maybe that was more because of our father’s favor than any true avoidance of mischief on my part as a child growing up.  
“Oh Locke, how could you have returned trapped power to a sea witch? Do you have any idea what you have done?” She continued berating me as if I couldn’t be aware of the fact that my own mother had returned my act of kindness with a malice I now had to admit in the privacy of my thoughts was pretty characteristic. But then wouldn’t any other wounded and tortured animal lash out in blind pain when confronted? The thought was no comfort for I knew my mother was not an animal and she had not been lashing out blindly but very specifically.  
“I had to.” I tried to explain gathering so much of my strength to force those words past my clenching throat. After listening to what father had done. After hearing the filth he had wallowed in and the pain he had gleefully doled out. After knowing what he had done to my mother, my sister and my family. After seeing through his eyes how he expected me to follow in his perverted and grotesque footsteps I could not sit back and do nothing. I was compelled to act contrary to his will and to make it right. Even if I had known what she would do I hope I would have had the strength to make the same choice.  
But Elbenie had always seen too far and known too much. After all she was the first to name the malice haunting our family for the curse it was. She was the one who had the presence of mind to take the letter from the floor and lay bare our father’s secrets. She was the one to first see our parents in all the ugly truth of their souls and not flinch away from what she knew was her duty to both them and herself.   
“That man’s debt was never yours to pay! Now you are cursed by the sea witch who bore us and does not deserve the name mother. Her hate is carved into your flesh with a soul deep curse that marks you with her taint. The Elderwood gates will not admit you into my beloved’s lands. What will I do? It cannot be undone!” She wailed then in heavy screeching cries that were so pained the broke the rest of my heart that my parent’s actions had left untouched.  
“Oh Elbie.” I cried harshly stealing the diminutive only Frans had used in the past. The trees grew farther from site and suddenly I could see my sister as I was gently lowered to the forest floor. She was breaking apart in the dappled light of the moon and a man I did not know stepped towards her to enfolder in his embrace as if he knew that he was the only thing holding her together and he would do so gladly. I had never seen love and tenderness tied so tightly together before in one package and it made my throat constrict in ways that the pain did not.  
“Elbenie, Elbenie.” He crooned softly and his voice was the rustling of falling leaves and crisp wind.  
“Please do not shed your tears my beloved. Your brother has made a choice that will lead him on a long journey that we cannot join him on but he is not forever lost. He is everything you have described him to be and you cannot fault him for being all the things you love because he has been hurt. He is growing from boy to man. The choices he makes with honor will sometimes come with a price. He choose to make right an old wrong rather then hide from it with cowardice. He has been both brave and kind. Even now he does not curse the one who has repaid his kindness with spite. You must believe in him Elbenie. Trust that the same qualities that guide him to do right will guide him back to our side. The light will always win when the dark magic used is wielded against an innocent. After all in the end even the sea witch was released from a spell that should have condemned her for life.”  
“Do not bring that wench into this conversation Persey, if you seek to make my heart feel whole you are failing miserably. You have taking me as your bride this night and by an exchange of blood and life turned me from the girl I once was into something other but the changes in my body and soul cannot change my heart. This is my little brother we look at. With morning frost I will fade to the autumnlands like you and all other creatures of fall but my brother will remain this broken mess of a man. Our home lies in smoldering ruins, the villagers have already turned their backs on us but their hate will know no bounds against the creature she has made him, he can barely stand much less walk and the snows will soon fall leaving him to starve alone in this freezing wood. And you ask me to believe?” The truth of her words stabbed me to the core as her voice raised in pure incomprehension. A shaft of light clearer than the rest struck them and I wondered if his skin was really that shade of grey. Were his ears actually adorned with a smattering of fine feathers or were they part of the tangled mop of his hair through which I was sure a baby owl blinked at me? Shadows hid his the color of his eyes but his smile was kinder than any I had ever seen on a stranger. In that moment I did not care if her fate for me was true I just prayed he would be as honest and true as he appeared. Elbenie deserved that and so much more.  
Persey lifted her furious face with the tip of his finger and pressed a kiss to her lips that looked like it infuriated and confused her.  
“Why? Wha? How dare you? I..!”  
He did it a second and a third time until she fell into silence then he held her again with that same gentle strength I wish I had myself for I was feeling terribly weak at this moment. She began to cry as her small frame shook with the force of her sobs. She was rattling apart and there was nothing I could do. Even worse I was the reason she was doing so. She was the last family I had left who had truly loved me and had been closer to me than any other as I grew up. This was what she deserved. A love strong enough to protect her. I thought of my father’s words and the future he had painted for her and me. The poison of those thoughts settled like a roiling snake in the pit of my belly. Heavy and unsettling.  
“Do you love me Elbenie?”  
“Ye… e….es”  
“Do you trust me Elbanie?”   
“Of course you lumbering fool!” She pulled away from him at that an affronted look on her face as her tears fought with her indignation. She slapped his arms fruitlessly as if she thought her small violence would return sense to him.  
“Then trust me when I tell you that your brother will one day be by our side again. I can feel winter coming close in my bones and there is precious little time for us to prepare your brother for his journey. I promised you happiness and love my bride and I know you need him for both. I will not be made a liar on my wedding eve. Words have power and magic to twist the fate of us all and especially on this last night of the hunter’s moon when my power and now yours grows strongest we need to believe in the power of our words to do him good.” Her eyes widened as if struck and she nodded once decisively understanding what he said far better than I.  
“I will. No I do.” She stated. Staring at me as if by will alone she could erase the pain lingering in my flesh.  
“Good, go to the spring that blessed our vows and bring me a handful of the moss that graces its edge. I shall wash away some of this filth and anoint him with our love and protection.”  
Without another word she ran in the opposite direction as Persey kneeled next to me and took my hand.  
“Hello young man, My name is Persey the luckiest fae in this world for I have your sister as my bride. I had hoped to meet you under better circumstances but none of us can weave our own strands of fate. I know the sea witch's malice is ringing through your head right now but that will fade in time. A Sea witch’s magic and power are tied to the sea of her birth and that alone. The farther inland you are or the deeper you travel into another sea the less power her magic will have over you. There is so much I have to tell you but so little time to do so. Magic binds us all whether humans choose to acknowledge it or not. As a creature of seasons I am bound by the temperance of time as is my power. As a creature of the forest I have no power over those born of desert, mountain or sea. By becoming my bride your sister has forsaken her birthright and become a creature of forest and glen too. The promises she made to me have changed her from blood to bone and when winter falls she will fade unless she returns to the autumnlands just as I will. Our court is allowed to walk the woods of man for fall and only fall. At the first sign of winter we must depart so my brother’s court might reign but we will be waiting for you to join us beyond the Elderwood gate.” I saw his eyes then. They were a curious orange color that were as bright as fresh copper but far warmer.   
“ The magic of the sea is a foreign language to me in its intricacies but I know there are those who might help you. If only I had more time I would take my myself.” He sighed as he accepted the moss offered my my sister and started wiping my face clean murmuring soft words that soothed my aching head. My sister was murmuring fiercely in an undertone that I would be fine, happy, whole and I would return to them.  
“There are three things you must remember Locke. They will guide you on this journey and help you where we cannot. The first is that a curse is magic given form and bound in vengeance against one who has done wrong and their bloodline but all magic is tied to rules that it must obey. Curses cannot hold against any but those in the words that have written its birth. No curse can be bound without an undoing for all magic must have an unraveling. A sea witch’s magic can only be used against others. They cannot and will not be able to take the life of another Sea witch and while I have no love for the sea’s creatures even I must acknowledge that not all of them are evil. Your mother has three younger sister’s each given her own sea and each powerful in her own right. They will best know how to unravel the curse she has gifted you. And last even if it looks so you are not alone. I name you brother and friend. Any creature of forest and glen will recognise you as such and will help you if you ask.”  
“Oh no Persey.” My sister intoned as she looked down at her hands they were starting to shimmer and grow faint. Persey pulled a small necklace of acorns from his neck and pressed it into the palm of my hand as the nip in the air grew almost frigid. The dry seeds felt centuries old and as strong as the oldman tree that guarded the forest entrance. He stood and pulled my sister to his side in a single movement and whistled a low sharp note. Something flew away from them and behind them I could see the very air shiver and wrest apart as the surrounding trees bowed low and swept through it with their tall branches cracking the very world to reveal something warmer and brighter. The scent of fallen apples were carried upon the air as he dragged Elbenie through and her bottom lip trembled. I could read the words on her lips but no sound passed through the gate.  
“You will be fine.” she had shouted in silence and they faded as I was once alone in the forest. Contemplating how his words would help me. I could smell the scent of ice in the air and an ache returned to my bones as I contemplated sitting up. I thought I heard the cry of a screech owl but it faded as I reminded myself I should be standing.


	11. A Childhood Fraught With Secrets 11/11

Chapter Ten  
I watched with dazed eyes telling myself that I could not be seeing what I thought I was seeing. Not a foot from my head stood a tiny woman made of ice who was dancing from leaf to fallen leaf. on her back where gossamer wings of white and she was as clear as glass as she laughed and spun. Everywhere she touched a spot of frost appeared and spread. She jumped up and glide to another spot drawing my gaze as I saw with amazement a whole battalion of the tiny creatures danced around spreading frost with a touch. one of them danced closer and pressed a kiss to my cheek that was biting cold among an avalanche of bell like laughter.   
“Blessings.” someone said and they laughed again before disappearing in a crumbling of ice dust.  
This was not supposed to be how frostfell.  
A shudder wracked my body as I felt something shift within. A perception or perhaps a knowledge that I would never be able to once again deny. I had seen something that could not be unseen and these tiny fairies of ice brought home the fact that my world had been forever changed more than anything else that had happened to me previously.  
In short order among a tinkling of bells the entire world was painted white. The reflection of light off of the ice lightened everything. There was a moment a silence that seemed to echo in perfection. I should be freezing to death here. My teeth should be chattering and my muscles spasming and tensing in pain. My fingers should be turning blue but as I lifted my hand I realised that I was comfortable. I was as comfortable as if I were laying in this same glade during the summer.   
The sound of thunder came and the trees that had once opened the way to the autumn lands bent to open their unseen gate again and this time a shimmer of ice danced between their limbs. I could see the swirling winds of a blizzard raging between them and from the sheaths of snow emerged a white stallion with dressage of scarlet and gold. It crashed past the gate and thundered across the ground trampling the delicate work of the frost fairies. Apparently even though departures are wreathed in silence arrivals are announced with sound and fury. More horses followed the first and hooves trampled the ground near me. For a moment I thought perhaps death by horse would be less scary than my future journey but I pushed the unbidden defeat aside. I was no coward and there were those waiting for me who believed in me too much to allow a momentary weakness to win. The horses were followed by the sound of hounds and trumpets. I closed my eyes and let the coming tide of joyous arrivals crash over and around me as laughter filled the air. Winter had come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of book one. The curse has been revealed, Our lead is now aware of the magic binding his life and his future journey has been set. Break the curse, saved his family and himself or die trying.


End file.
